The insanity began about a week ago, well, last thursday to be exact. It just kind of creeped in and seems to have settled on me for the time being. I had no warning. I had no thought process that went with it.
My day starts out normally enough. Get up, smoke a cigarrette after I let Lucky out, get a bath, put my contacts in and watch a little of the Today show until Lucky wants back in. Then I get dressed and go to work.
It isnt until after work the insanity begins. I wasnt looking for it, but it is here nonetheless. It is detestable, but at the same time it seems good for me. In fact it feels so good to me that I feel like my normal mornings will be infested with it too. I cant imagine this insanity in the morning and the evening.
The insanity is lasting about 30 minutes. Then it is over. I let nothing interefer with the dirty, secret, insane part of me. Lucky participates in the insanity with me. She seems to enjoy it very much. But what does she know--she is a dog. (Dig at Jeff's "she's just a dog" comment.) I dont even smoke during this insanity. Sometimes the insanity causes me to sweat. I hate sweating. But I continue on with the insanity.
When I think about it, I am enjoying the insanity--I sleep better, eat less and I am in an overall better mood. Funny that insanity can do that for you. It isnt supposed to. I have heard insanity defined as doing the same the over expecting different results. I have also heard that you dont know you are insane until you come out of it and look back on what was going on. Then in your sane moment you realize that you had been insane. Well, Im right in the middle of it and I know this is not me. This is something I have avoided my entire life. But every dog has his day they say. This must be my day.
What is my insanity?
I am WALKING.
I am taking walks to try to increase my energy and decrease Lucky's. The reason it is insane is because I HATE exercise. Maybe if I let the insanity of the walk continue I may change my mind one day and love it. I know Lucky hopes I do.