Thursday, November 6, 2008

I Hate Days Like This

Life is short. It should be lived to its fullest. People should be able to be happy no matter what circumstances they find themselves in. Counting your blessing, focusing on the positive and working towards building your life into something productive and being all you can be seems to be the key to happiness.

Many times I have fallen short of that ideal. I have often found my happiness to be the result of other people. The result of what is going on in their life, their pain and their accomplishments. That kind of thinking does not work. I need to find my own happiness. It is hard when you see someone you love hurting.

I get depressed when the people I love are hurting and I cant do anything to help them. I feel like I am letting them down in some way. I am sad today because a family member is hurting and their life is not all they planned it to be. All I have ever wanted for them is happiness and a fullfilling family life. When they hurt, I hurt.

I wish I could make everything okay. The frustration of not being able to do so is overwhelming and depressing. So today, I am sad, depressed and very fearful of what tomorrow will bring.

4 comments:

Linda said...

Damnit Lynn, I know exactly how you feel. It's hard to watch people suffering from life's issues and it really sucks to not be able to just "fix it". Sometimes I get a big ole belly ache from other peoples stress!

Then again, when I look back on my OWN life, and how effed up it seemed several times, I know that things get better. There is always a silver lining. The best life lessons came from those very dark,dark days.

Jenn Martinson said...

I'm sorry...but I bet they feel a little better knowing that you care.

Unknown said...

Lynn - I am giving you a big hug, and I can tell you that with today being bad, you are almost guaranteed tomorrow to be good. We cannot fix others pain, but we can support their lives to the fullest of ours. You and yours are always in my prayers. BIG HUG!! Let's eat chocolate. It beats Vodka!

Anonymous said...

Lynn,
I hear ya. One of my closest friends is going into rehab today. I am with her in spirit and I physically ache for her. I also understand what Linda said. I am sure she and you have been hurt and feeling my pain on a daily basis. That makes me feel bad. But you know what..... I love you guys for that. You (we) would not be the caring individuals that we are if we didn't feel our loved ones pain. It proves that we feel things deeply.
Someone who means the world to me recently said something that took my breath away. "You bleed I bleed" Nuff said.
Love ya girlie Denise.